One year ago, I left my job.
How did I envisage myself one year on?
Am I happy with where I have gotten to?
What did I hope for?
I genuinely had no idea what I was hoping for, nor what the next year would bring. The aim was simply to make my lifestyle sustainable and then to grow from there (wherever ‘there’ was). I was without a clear plan for moving forwards, I just had to start walking and see where I ended up.
I’d decided to live off fear. There was fear in anticipation of the decision, but on leaving It was amazing how quickly that sense subsided over that of liberation.
I lived purely off adrenaline for the first couple of months, everyday held a plethora of activities I’d committed to with no idea whether I could actually do them. A crust of bravery concealed a core of terror. Things happened slowly at first, searching for and taking all and any opportunities. Soon enough life started to get busy. Opportunities turned into commitments and time started to get short. Relief and euphoria replaced the nerves as I completed things I’d never have thought. This was a highly rewarding process.
Looking back at the road I have carved, how do I feel about it?
Proud? It is incredibly easy to underestimate what has happened in a year, caught up in an infinite list of to do’s. It is hard to remember that awe and admiration I felt for people who’d gone it alone and started their own company, longing and hoping to do the same. One year ago, I didn’t know what was going to happen. Here we are with serious offers of funding, national media coverage, a regular schedule of events and 800 participants since January. Putting it like that, I suppose I have a few things to be proud of.
Expected this outcome? I quit my job alone. I am now working with an amazing team. It is easy to forget I expected to be slogging it alone and regrettably easy to take working with Rosemary for granted. Looking back at the week when I managed to pull Rosemary into Rabble, I realise how stupidly lucky I was. I can’t even imagine how different things would have been without that moment. Rabble is all the better for it. And now we have also have Daria, could we have asked for a better team?
Richer? Ha ha, hell no – in the financial sense. One year of draining my savings is really kicking home now. Fortunately that bears little importance, as I’m richer in experience, knowledge, purpose and love for life.
Risky? The overt feeling of risk subsided rapidly as I realised I can survive without a formal job. But the underlying sense of not yet being sustainable definitely remains somewhere in my subconscious. But let’s say it all fell through tomorrow (not planning on this!), gains would heavily outweigh the losses: in experience, learning, excitement, friendships and personal development.
Loving life? Absolutely. I’m driving along a path that I’m building, towards an outcome I really believe in. I have far more purpose, I’m not doing a job ‘I fell into’, because I needed a job.
Stressed? Absolutely. I have a lot at stake. I’m currently losing money month on month. Uncertain when the outflow will be stemmed. I wear many different hats to attempt to stem the loss, a biology teacher, maths tutor, sports coach as well as rabble founder. I ‘work’ most hours in the day. But I need stress, I’m in trouble with out it.
Exciting? Totally. I have no idea what’s going to happen next and it’s always something I never expect! It’s the thrill of new experiences that form the fabric of life.
Learning? On a second by second basis. In many ways I’d hoped but in many ways I’d not forecast. Picking up a huge amount about myself and my behaviour in addition to general business learnings. And still have SO far to go..
People? I doubt I’ve ever met so many diverse and interesting people. From our participants who make rabble what it is, brightening my days on a regular basis. To generous and challenging investors and other contributors, friends and entrepreneurs who’ve offered help in various forms during this process. SO many new inspirators.
Recommend? Without a second of hesitation. Ask yourself are you living? How much of your life is predictable? Will you look back and think, I made the most of what I had, I really chased my dreams?
Future? Who knows? I’m just as vague as I was when I started out. Just keep doing the things that matter and how can it go wrong.
With THANKS to everyone who has supported us over the last year, by coming to a session, offering advice or helping in any other way. Rabble is a product of the help we have recieved..